Wednesday, February 14

Happy Hallmark Day

Although my stomach isn’t usually strong enough to tolerate the barrels of saccharine love messages that spill about so carelessly on this particular day each year, I find myself still choking on the taste of surly singledom today. I woke up – alone - in Togi’s bed this morning (having promised to do his dishes for him while he was away) and stumbled down the stairs for a coffee and a fag.

Morning world.
Morning Dorothy.
How are you today world?
Very well, thank you Dorothy, now piss off and leave me alone to tend to matters of the heart.
Thank you world. Good bye.

My day starts earnestly enough. I don’t much like Valentine’s Day anyway - I have a Philosophy against this sort of ridiculous commercialisation and a Philosophy is a far better thing to have than a box of chocolates. Right? So, what of it if the only person to send me a valentine’s so far is a gay friend.

Why then this surprising surliness? This little irritation in my belly? It’s not that I feel today is any more important than the next, dear world, but for fuckssakes is one little sms to much to ask? One insignificant secret admirer somewhere too much expect? That couldn’t be too difficult to manage, now would it world? World?

I think back to school and remember how even then I never received those momentos of undying like and wonder why I haven’t simply gotten used to it. And besides, what’s stopping me from making love out of air and sending roses and organising picnics with wine and sex? The answer is about as empty as my heart: I have Boundaries see? And Philosophies.

Once in the office, my sometime-lover sends me an emoticon rose. It hangs lonely in the pool of msn space with not much to say that isn’t already blatantly obvious about our affair. I ignore it with a flourish.
There are these Boundaries he explains later.
I know, I want to yell back, I put them there – I am aware of that. But still! I want undying love on this day of bloody cupid bloody-hell. I want roses and hearts and bloody blood dammit. Even if I am vegetarian.

Togi calls me later and tells me that his Valentine’s Day plans involve a romp at Spur with his sister, brother-in-law and their twenty children. Get drunk quickly I advise, it’s the only way to see your way clear of that travesty of food. On second thoughts though, I’m starting to wonder if dining at a local Spur wouldn’t be the perfect way to cure me of my Valentine’s Day blues. That place is full of unimaginative couples mindlessly parading through the motions of courting in a one-act play of Love totally devoid of irony! It’s totally the perfect way to dispel any flounced up notions of Valentine’s Day.

The thought plays in so well with my Philosophies and Boundaries, I am almost envy Togi his experience. Now. If I could just get me someone to go and be ironic with…

GO HERE. IT'S FUNNY.

8 comments:

Lily said...

I am a Valentinadequate - for proof see latest post :-(

marita says said...

Darling Dorothy,
I had a hard time figuring out who Togi was, for a moment I thought you were dating and not telling me. The Spur bit tipped me off though! I spent a bit of time chatting with A yesterday. I hear you about Valentine's Day. We had a lovely evening having take-out from Spice Shop and lots of bottles of wine. But when I came home I was all alone. How depressing.
I miss you,
B

Anonymous said...

Dear Dot. Ah yes our favourite "another excuse to try suck money out everyone day". So did I celebrate in style? romantic dinners? flowers? HA! no thank you, noodles for us! although i confess to buying chocolate... but only because I like chocolate. and who needs an excuse to eat chocolate anyway?

dorothy said...

who indeed. if chocolate were a measure of a good V-day, i'd be having an excellent v-day once a month at least!

marita - had to use Togi as the Antons in my life are becoming confusing :) miss you too. lots.

dorothy said...

who indeed. if chocolate were a measure of a good V-day, i'd be having an excellent v-day once a month at least!

marita - had to use Togi as the Antons in my life are becoming confusing :) miss you too. lots.

Carien said...

Honestly, Valentine's Day should be replaced with some absurd new name having nothing at all to do with pink and red hearts. If they can change the names of half the places and public holidays in SA, why not Valentine's Day as well? The world would be a happier place, I reckon.

arcadia said...

read this post waaayyy late, but it still echoed my sentiments exactly :-)

Sparky said...

valentines day is what you make it.

I choose to make it as happy a day as I can

besides...it gives me licence to act the way I'd like to act every day.