Wednesday, July 15

the funny

plums.

it's been difficult to update as regularly as i'd like. my mind is a-brimming with all the lovely things i need to opine about. (hows that for verbalising).

however. i have been muchly busy with getting drunk and finishing off interesting articles (about which i will more later - they have been dreaded and long overdeadline pulling teeth out articles - one on nollywood and film in africa and the other on refugees).

HOWEVER.

i have come across much funniness betwixt deadlines which you must must must go check out.

with fantastic headlines like 'Congress takes over GM and launches its first new car' and 'What conspiracy theory really killed David Carradine?' and my personal LOL moment today, 'Man contemplating suicide, gets a helpful push off bridge.'

real stories, made-up ones and theorising.

precious. go to retardzone.com


brilliant. diabolical. evil genius. rude. insulting. smart. all these words and more spring to mind.

'mike' answers classifieds. the rest is hysteria.

for example:

Original ad:
I am a 17 year old looking for a summer job. it is hard for me to find work and I just want a job so I can afford a car for college next summer. I can clean, babysit, answer phones, pretty much whatever as long as it pays!!

From Mike Anderson to ***********@***********.org
Hey,

I saw your ad looking for work and I think I have a job for you! I am looking for an assistant on my farm for the summer. It will involve working outdoors. Let me know if you are interested.

Mike

From Stephanie ******* to Me
Hi Mike! I am interested in your job! I love animals and used to ride horses so a farm would be great! what kind of work would I be doing, and where is your farm located? it needs to be close to ******** so my parents can drop me off and pick meup

From Mike Anderson to Stephanie *********
Stephanie,

It is very close to **********. I'm glad to hear you are familiar with horses, because you will be primarily working with horses.

My farm gets all the old horses that other farms don't need anymore, and they are starting to take up a lot of room in my stable, which I want to turn into a garage for my new truck. Therefore, the horses need to go. As my assistant, you will be in charge of killing the horses and dumping them in the lake behind my farm. read on...

go here for more...

oao plums - interestingness up soon.

4 comments:

nursemyra said...

I like the "High rise fridge delivery"

dorothy said...

that is particularly funny. i love how some people actually go through with the dialogue

Gorilla Bananas said...

I'm glad some people aren't buying the story that David Carradine wanked himself to death.

Sparky said...

for your reading pleasure, I give you http://www.textsfromlastnight.com/